jayellebee's Blog

August 23, 2012

Wanna Peek in My Drawers?

Filed under: Musings — Joanne @ 10:03 pm
Tags: , , ,

     The crumbs in my kitchen drawers have been mocking me for weeks.  Make that months.  Until now I’ve successfully ignored their dirty looks.  Squinting helps, not wearing my glasses is even more effective.  Let’s face it, housework is not my strong suit. 

     However, a few days ago I jokingly posted on Facebook, “Hmm, clean the kitchen drawers or play Spider Solitaire….”  I’m happy to report I’ve won several games since then.  But today, my conscience got the better of me and I decided to tackle the long overdue chore.

     The problem is, cleaning drawers is like lining up dominoes.  The first one falls, and then the second, and then, well, you know.  The process reminded me of a popular children’s’ book by Laura Numeroff called If You Give a Mouse a CookieIn that story, the cookie makes the mouse thirsty, so he wants a glass of milk.  The milk makes him want something else,  and then something else, until finally he gets another cookie and once again becomes thirsty. 

     Cleaning the crumbs — as well as the black dog fur — out of my drawers necessitated removing all the contents.  Some of those items hadn’t been touched in the two years since we moved here, so I went in search of a box to amass things destined for delivery to the Hospice thrift store.  Everything else needed to be sorted and organized in the newly clean drawer.

     Much to my amazement, I discovered three drawers had never been lined.  No fragment of memory remains to tell me why they were omitted.  This is a total mystery.  My next novel may be titled, “The Case of Missing Liner.”  Anyhow, I once again fled the kitchen, reappearing with shelf paper, a measuring tape, and scissors.

     When the drawers below the counter top were done, a step back reminded me I also have cabinets above the counter.  Drat.  While the shelves housing dishes and glasses weren’t bad, over time, the contents of the baking cabinet had become a complete jumble.  Taking everything out led to the high point of my day — a partial bag of forgotten chocolate chips hidden behind a mound of other ingredients.  Fortified by a handful or two (okay, five) of my favorite melt-in-your-mouth food group, I aligned sugars on one shelf and  flours on another.  Wow, who knew I had three bags of powdered sugar?  Someone has butter cream frosting in her future!

     Dazzled by my own success, I turned to the spices.  Oh, dear.  They occupy three different turntables, and each one was a filthy disgrace.  Once the lazy Susans were clean and dry, I replaced the jars, cans and boxes in alphabetical order, labels facing outward.  I know, I know.  This has to be the sign of a very sick mind.  Nonetheless, duplicates — in some cases triplets — became obvious and were consolidated, paprika with a shelf date of 1998 received a proper burial, and  desiccated candied ginger earned me two points on a rim shot. 

     The dominoes continued to fall.  The granite in this house is very busy with waves of swirling colors.  Much to my delight, this effectively camouflages all manner of dust and spills.  Excellent for my less than fastidious cleaning habits.  Still, all that wiping of debris from the cabinets above had left a visible mess on the counter tops.  I systematically removed small appliances and gadgets from one work area to another, wiping, scraping and eventually drying the granite.  But then, of course, I felt obliged to remove the grime from the toaster, the coffee maker and the knife block.  The knives!  When was the last time they saw a sharpener.  Sigh.

     Once the counter tops shone, the cook top stood out like a billy-goat in a flower garden.  Does the agony never end?  I de-greased the bacon splatters, but ignored the juice that bubbled out of last week’s peach pie and is now burned onto the floor of the self-cleaning oven.  Here’s the deal: As long as I keep the door closed, the black deposit doesn’t show.  That task can wait for cooler weather.  January, maybe. 

     The twelve-year-old, double stainless steel sink growled at me.  Hopeless.  No product exists that could bring back the luster or erase the scratches.  But at least the smelly disposal and its rubber spoon-stopper got a thorough decontamination.

     I relaxed, admiring the fruit of my labor — and saw the sticky mess on the floor I’d washed yesterday.  Now, really.  In what universe is that fair?  Wash the floor twice in two days?  Come on.  And worst of all, I’m the only one who’s even going to notice how spiffy everything looks.  I knew I should have waited to take on those pesky drawer crumbs until company was expected.

     Anyone wanna take a peek in my drawers?

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5 Comments »

  1. You never know when you’ll have friends house sit.
    Chris (house sitting in Arroyo Grande)

    Comment by Chris Pedersen — August 24, 2012 @ 6:55 am | Reply

  2. Lining drawers? What language is THIS? Your blog should have a disclaimer at the top. Now I don’t dare walk into my kitchen . . .

    Comment by lizbooks — August 24, 2012 @ 9:56 am | Reply

  3. I can’t believe it’s been two years!

    Comment by Donna — August 27, 2012 @ 8:37 am | Reply

  4. And still you had time to blog about it!! Enjoyable reading.

    Comment by Lucinda Porter — September 15, 2012 @ 8:37 pm | Reply

    • Thanks for visiting my blog, Lucinda!

      Comment by Joanne — September 16, 2012 @ 5:23 pm | Reply


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